8 weird things I’m tempted to do under the guise of executing social experiments

1. Go up to someone just finishing a banana, point to the peel and ask “can I borrow that?”
2. Have you ever been walking behind a group of people on a sidewalk? Ostensibly, they will be strolling along at a snail’s pace while you are speed walking in an attempt to reach your destination with the greatest degree of efficiency. If they are reasonably observant humans, they will all get into a single file line to let you pass. Instead of passing them, someday I will just get in line behind them so that we can all enjoy a single file stroll.
3. Hang around outside public bathrooms and scream “It’s a trap!” at anyone going in.
4. Wear macaroni necklaces as an accessory on a daily basis. Eat pieces of noodles off it whenever people are watching.
5. Tell people getting onto elevators that their grandmother says hello.
6. Get tickets to another school’s march madness game. Dress up in their school’s color like a super fan and cheer in the student section like my life depends on the game.
7. Take a turtle for a walk.
8. Take a turtle with me everywhere in a purse like people do with little dogs.

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